Friday, August 27, 2010

Ma Familia: Mother, Dear

Empty nest = Bubba the Bulldog
The picture doesn't do her justice, but I love it because it's her and Bubba, who thinks he's her child. 

Have I mentioned lately that I think I’m growing up? The fact that I am married and about to have a baby is probably a pretty indication to most people. It’s more than that, though, and it started long before the baby. Over the last few years, I’ve noticed a change in my head and my heart. I love my mother, of course. I always have. The difference is, now that I’m older, I appreciate my mother. They’re easy to take for granted, I think. You get so used to relying on her that you don’t realize how much you do. This change of heart all started right around my senior year of high school, but it has grown more and more ever since. That year, my great-grandmother passed away. The day of her funeral, my Grandma told me, “When you lose your Mom, you lose your best friend.” I never forgot that. Partly, because my Grandma and Great-Grandma never seemed that close.

Since then, I’ve grown to understand more and more what she meant. My mother wasn’t a perfect parent. She’s a little kooky, and sometimes her words and actions make no sense at all to me. Some days she downright drives me crazy. It’s taken me years to truly understand how much she loves my brothers and me. She would do absolutely anything for us. She has always made sure our needs were taken care of before her own. For years, I thought that’s how it was supposed to be, and it was. What I didn’t realize was that not all mothers saw it that way. We got new clothes when we needed them. She never bought anything new for herself. If she needed something, she went to Goodwill. Of course, she shopped at Goodwill for our clothes sometimes too, but we got new things if we needed them. Since I’ve been married, I’ve noticed keeping in touch and visiting people is harder. Dean and I sometimes feel like we do all the visiting, and that no one comes to see us. The exception to the rule is my mother. She doesn’t have to have an excuse to come, or someone else to see while she’s at it. It’s time to move? Mom is coming to help where she can. People are coming over to help weld up the steel frame on our house? Mom is there to make everyone lunch. She stands out, because when others aren’t, Mom is there.

When the baby comes, Mom will be there. I just have to convince her that she doesn’t have to listen to Grandma and stay for two months. Because, when baby comes, she’s not the only one who will be there!

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